I want to preface this by reminding you that I am not a scientist, nor am I an expert in mental health, depression, or anxiety (though I did earn my Bachelor's degree in Psychology, so I know a little bit). If you disagree with anything I say here, I would be happy to hear about it and read your sources. I love to learn. What is written here is solely my opinion, which funny enough, may be different from yours.
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I once told you that I "have depression". I'm not sure if refuting a publicly made statement makes me less credible, but I am here today to tell you that I don't actually know if I "have depression". I don't really fit the diagnostic criteria in the DSM-V, the handbook of psychological symptoms and disorders.
I have a strong suspicion that when I told you I "have depression", I was only one of many, many people who have told you the same thing. Maybe you've said it yourself, or maybe you thought to yourself, "Oh no, not another one jumping on the depression bandwagon". I would have been offended back then, if you'd said that to me. However, I now firmly believe in the "depression bandwagon", and that I very enthusiastically leaped onto it.
I do not think that the vast majority of people "have depression" as I once did. However, I do think that many, many people have been depressed.
Here's the thing: It is an untruth to say that mental illness is always chronic ("chronic" in this sense referring to an illness that persists over the course of a lifetime). It is true that it is a pervasive, all-encompassing phenomenon that entirely consumes and overwhelms the person experiencing it. But it is not always chronic.
There are plenty of people who have experienced a total of one depressive episode (see definition here) in their lives, recovered, and never experienced the same thing again. There are plenty of people who have experienced two depressive episodes in their lives, and have otherwise been completely mentally healthy. There are also plenty of people who experience depressive episodes again, and again, and again; these are the people we diagnose with Major Depressive Disorder. These are the people who "have depression".
Thus, experiencing only one depressive episode does not necessarily mean that you "have depression".
I think it's highly unlikely that you will make it through your life without experiencing a depressive episode. You may even experience several. For many people, depression is the body's way of coping with a traumatic or difficult experience. For many of these people, therapy is the method by which they pull themselves out of the depressive episode. Therapy should not be stigmatized. "I have a therapist" is not code for "I'm too psychotic to cope with the stressors of everyday life that 'normal' people deal with on their own". "I have a therapist" means "I'm having a hard time right now and would like some help sorting it out". Having a therapist is normal. Everyone should see a therapist from time to time. It would solve a heck of a lot of problems in the world.
In the movies, therapists are often portrayed either as wise sages or hypocritical basket cases who pretend to have their own lives figured out while they help hysterical people feel good about themselves. Sometimes that's how it is. Heaven knows during my time in therapy (which wasn't long enough, might I add), I was one of those hysterical people who wouldn't stop crying. But it is not always that way.
Sometimes people go to therapy because they need someone to be their sounding board while they wrestle with a big decision, or because life has gotten a little too chaotic and they need someone to help make sense of it all. Therapy is not all about raising someone's self-esteem or balancing the ratio of warm fuzzies to cold pricklies (though it can do those things).
I guess the point I'm trying to make is that while there is still some stigma around mental illness, it has almost become the "popular" thing to do. People feel bad for you if you're depressed. They worry about you. They check in on you. And because of that, it's sometimes a hard bandwagon not to jump on, especially if you're at a particularly low point in your life.
However, when we prematurely jump on the bandwagon, we minimize the seriousness of the condition and make it that much more difficult for our friends who do have depression to be taken seriously. If you are currently experiencing a depressive episode, I am truly sorry. I've been there. I know how much it sucks. I know that it feels like it will never end. But -- it will. Episodes rarely last longer than a year, and usually end within a few weeks or months. I know that sounds like a long time right now, but you will get through it. Talk to a friend. Talk to a therapist. Maybe ask if medication could be a solution. Keep doing the things you love to do. Things will get better.
Along with that, things may get worse again. That's okay. It could mean you actually do have depression, and that's okay. Let me reiterate: Talk to a friend. Talk to a therapist. Ask about medication. Do things you love. There are ways to cope with mental illness. A diagnosis of depression and/or anxiety is not a death sentence. In fact, it just may be the start of you getting your life back.
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