My Life's Mission

"Today I am pleased to announce that able,
 worthy young women who have the desire
 to serve may be recommended for missionary
 service beginning at age 19, instead of age 21."

The most distinct memory I have of ever listening to General Conference is from the October session of conference in 2012. I was thirteen and I listened intently as our prophet, President Thomas S. Monson announced that young women could now serve missions beginning at age 19. It was the first of several church policy changes since that have all been aimed at hastening the work of the Lord.

Until that day, I had never contemplated serving a mission. The age for sisters was 21, and I, knowing that my mom hadn't served because she had married my dad at 21, assumed I would follow the same pattern.

But now the age was 19. And 19 was way too young to be married at.

Aww look how cute they are!!

Over the next five years I devoted myself to preparing for missionary service. I had never felt such an excitement for the gospel in my entire life. When I began seminary, my mom gave me a new set of scriptures. As I marked up the margins I imagined myself using these same notes and teachings to bless the lives of my Father's children, wherever in the world I might meet them.

I took a Sunday morning missionary preparation class from a former stake and mission president, President Rose, my senior year of high school and I loved it. His approach to the class was to teach us the gospel inside and out so we could teach it to others. I came to know in a way that I never had that I was a child of God. I had always known that God was my Father, but suddenly I realized that my Father is God. As I began to approach Him as my literal Father rather than the abstract Creator of the universe, my prayers and scripture study became focused and sincere and intentional. I wanted nothing more than to share the joy the gospel of Jesus Christ had brought to my life.

All my girls literally radiated the light
of Christ. They will all be
incredible missionaries, whether they
serve missions or not.

After I graduated I applied to work as a counselor at Brighton Beehive Camp. In the months leading up to camp, I read the entire Book of Mormon with real intent and gained a profound testimony of it. I know it is the word of God. The summer was the best of my life. The seed of my testimony was planted when I attended camp as a Beehive and I was so excited to be able to do the same for these sweet daughters of God. The summer was my own personal version of mission prep and I left camp with an even greater desire to spend a year and a half serving the Lord.

To prepare for the living-away-from-home part of missionary service, I decided to move out and attend a year of college at UVU rather than living at home and attending the Tooele extension of USU. At school I enrolled in a missionary preparation institute course and watched excitedly as one by one, my classmates received their mission calls and began to leave for various parts of the world. At my teacher's urging I began praying for my future investigators and missionary

Another thing I would never do: attend
a college other than Utah State.

companions. I loved them though I didn't know them yet. I mourned the fact that my May birthday made me younger than most of the kids in my class. It had never bothered me before but now I wanted nothing more than to receive my own call and embark on my own mission.

In October I began taking Temple Prep on Sundays from Sister Goodman in my ward, though I knew it would still be several months before I would be able to receive my endowment. That semester of school I lived in the institute building, serving on committees and studying for both school and my mission constantly. My plan for my life was unfolding exactly as I wanted it to and I couldn't have been happier.

In November I mentioned to a friend in a conversation that I was probably going to serve a mission (though in my mind there wasn't much "probably" in it). "Unless you meet a guy?" he asked.

See, just look at that devious
smile. I should've known as
soon as I met him that he was
up to something.

"I don't know. I guess so" I replied. I hadn't really thought about it. I knew that as a woman I wasn't under any obligation to serve a mission, and if the opportunity to get married arose I would have to seriously consider it. But in what universe would the opportunity arise?

Little did I know that the man my roommate and I had met two days before already had plans to change my mission plans.

Three weeks later Jason and I were dating, though I hadn't promised not to serve a mission. He did his best to be supportive but I could tell that was the last thing he wanted me to do. Over the next several weeks I prayed constantly. I had felt so surely that this was God's will for me. I wanted so much to share the gospel and serve His children. That was such a good thing. So why was I in this situation right now? Why couldn't I have met Jason after I had the chance to serve? Was marrying Jason really God's plan for me or was it Satan's attempt to prevent me from saving souls?

I didn't know, and I didn't know how I could know.

Jason attended my last temple prep class with me and we were the only two there that day with Sister Goodman. Towards the end of the lesson she said to me, "So you're planning on serving a mission right?"

"Well..." I paused. "I don't know."

How about both?

She gave me a confused look, then glanced back and forth between us before finally noticing our clasped hands and her mouth opened in a big O of understanding. The last twenty minutes of the lesson was devoted to teaching me the benefits of marriage over mission, Jason enthusiastically nodding along with everything she said. I agreed with many of the things she told me, though I still knew it wouldn't necessarily be wrong for me to choose to serve instead of getting married.

But then she started talking about my future family, about my children as my future investigators and my spouse as my companion. And I realized that my choice was not between mission and marriage because marriage is a mission.

No, I will not leave my home and family for eighteen months or preach in a foreign language. I won't report to an official mission president and I won't anxiously await companion transfers every six weeks. I won't knock on doors and I won't wear dresses every day and I will never have a name tag with "Sister Leary" engraved on it. I probably will never wake up at 6:30 to study scriptures for two hours and I'll never get to give a farewell or a homecoming talk. But I will serve my own mission.

I actually do have a name tag that
President Rose made me...just not
an official one. :)

I'll have one companion, not several, and he'll be a man rather than a woman. I'll keep my companion for eternity, not just for a few months. The investigators I prayed for will still get those blessings that I asked for them, they just haven't been born yet. I will still get to share the joy of the gospel, and I'll get to do that for the rest of my mortal life, not just for eighteen months. The Light of Christ that I carry with me will mark me as His disciple, not a black and white name tag.

I've already received my mission call.


Dear Sister Leary,
You are called to serve as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. You are assigned to labor in the Orem, Utah mission and wherever else the Lord may call you throughout your life. You will preach the gospel in the language of service and love for your fellow man, and from time to time the Lord will place words in your mouth that He would have you speak to bless His children. It is expected that you will serve for the rest of your mortal life, and throughout the eternities. You have already reported to your mission training and your mission begins now. 

Aww look how cute WE are!!

How lucky I am to have such a unique call. How excited I am to have been blessed with the opportunity to marry a simply fantastic man who I love more than anything, who is my very best friend in the world, and who will be my companion as we raise our own righteous missionaries and serve and bless people's lives as long as we live.

This is the mission the Lord has been preparing me for. It was not my plan for me, but it was His. And I am so, so grateful for the mission of my life.