Prologue: In Which I Ambitiously Decide to Begin a Project Which May or May Not Reach Completion

Some authors write novels. Some write biographies or autobiographies, some write articles for papers and journals and websites, some write magazine columns on the latest dieting trends or who's dating whom, some write textbooks and some just text. Point being, basically everyone falls into one of these categories, myself included, and so I like to consider myself an author.

I love words. I love to write. For the most part, I honestly kinda suck at expressing myself out loud. The words originate in my head, sounding as eloquent as Shakespeare himself, and yet somewhere in the nanoseconds between the thought and the utterance they've morphed into something else entirely. I'm not quite sure what causes this phenomenon but I understand it's not a unique one. 

Luckily people are creative, and so we have other mediums of communication, written text being one of them. And so, here I am. 

Every literate person probably has a bookcase in their brain.
Fair warning: I intend to fill yours will all the relatively
 meaningless jargon in mine. 

Some of you may know that I am a voracious blog reader. I would like to be as voracious of a blog writer (although anyone who's actually looked over this blog will know that that is not always the case). I've read funny blogs, just-another-day-in-the-life blogs, religious blogs, cooking blogs (because I love food but unfortunately don't enjoy cooking all that much), you name it, I've read it. I love reading about people's everyday lives because it's fascinating to me how human beings are able to take something so mundane and make it so beautiful. I am passionate about the very act of living, regardless of how important my particular life is in the grand scheme of things. What would the world be without its individual, ordinary people? Not much of a world at all I think. 

I want to share that passion with you. I want to tell you the story of my very ordinary life and I want you to feel how truly extraordinary it is to me. And then I want you to feel the same about yours. \

So, now you know what I'm doing here, in the vast chaotic abyss that we know as the internet. The question is, what are you doing here? 

The World Wide Web: Specializing in Vastness and Chaos
since 1990.

Well anyway, that doesn't matter. I have a project in mind. Let me tell you about it.

First, some background. You will find I am rather morbid for an eighteen-year-old and have been for quite some time (about since I became a hormonal angsty teenager). I have a strange fascination with endings, death in particular. 

Needed Interjection: Do not be alarmed. Do not call the suicide hotline. I am in fact wonderfully happy to be alive. 

 However I am honestly intrigued by the concept that one day I will die. That doesn't mean my existence on this earth has to end though. The fact is that I want to be remembered. I'm incredibly egotistical, as I'm sure some of you know. When I do die, as we all will, I want people to remember me. I want them to miss me. And I want them to have something to turn to that will remind them of me, of the life I lived. And I want them to miss me because I impacted them for good. I want my life to count for something. When horrific things happen, as they inevitably will, and people lose all hope that there is any good left, I want them to remember me, to remember the light that is in the world because I existed in it. I want to be an instrument for good in God's hands and I want to be an inspiration for others to do the same. 

And so--my project. 

I'm going to tell you my life story. It is said that every action we make is the culmination of all of our life's experiences up to that point and I believe that to be true. I suppose you could say I hope to learn things about myself--what makes me tick, why I do the things that I do. I want to explore all of my life's experiences and I want to share them with you. 

Not these fans

Who is you? I suppose I don't quite know. At times I've posted this blog on social media in the hopes that I would acquire a vast assortment of adoring fans, but I suppose if that were to happen I would've had to actually post occasionally. Which I plan to do, for the record. But at the moment, this is just going to be me. I'm not writing for you. Not for the world, my parents, my friends, my Brighton girls, my siblings, my teachers. No one but me. Because I want to know who I am. And then, when I do finally share this for the world to see, I want you to know who I am. And I hope when you read this, and see me, you see Christ. And because of the things I have done for Him, you will go out and do great things for Him, greater than I ever could. And then maybe together, we can change the world. 

We can make it a little better.  

"For I am crucified with Christ; nevertheless, I live; Yet not I, but Christ liveth in me;
And the life which I now live in the flesh, I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me,
and gave Himself for me"
-Galations 2:20